Last year I entered the New York City Marathon. The race started and immediately I was the last of the runners. It was embarrassing. The guy who was in front of me, second to last, was making fun of me. He said, "Hey buddy, how does it feel to be last?" I replied: "Do you want to know?" and I dropped out.

A runner asks his wife: "What do you love most about me? My tremendous athletic ability or my superior intellect?" "What I love most about you," responded the man's wife, "is your enormous sense of humor."

Q. How do crazy runners go through the forest?
A. They take the psycho path.