I think it was the 7 foot hill.

First 3.1 miles: 22:18
Second 3.1 Miles: 22:19

In all seriousness, the reason for the slight slowing in time (actually I was a little quick hitting my watch so I might have been faster on the way back) was the winds that gusted up to 21 mph in my face on the way home. But I am not complaining. Even though it was a run at night, any time I can go for a pancake-flat, run in 62-degree weather just a few days before Christmas, I am a happy puppy.

I am even happier when such a glorious run happens after a crazy day. Let me explain.

This morning I was driving through the middle of central Florida. Having been to the Ocala area last year to run a marathon, I was eager to see more of the off-roads that I had experienced in the run. So eschewing the main high way drag I decided to venture off-road.

Now, the previous night I had done something similar. I was looking for a nice road to run on someday, back in the woods where it would be glorious to run unhindered. Using my Mapping software on my computer I found what seemed ideal…until I came to a fence ending the road. Heading back, I found another road but before long this road turned jungle-esque. My rental car barely wedged through the foliage as it scraped my windows and batted at my windshield. But the terrain was soft and forgiving and all I could think about was how wonderful la run this would be. Until it started getting dark. Then this road became spooky as hell. And then it ended. Out of nowhere. So I had to do a 30-point turn (the road was no wide than the car at some points and I mean NO wider.) to get out. This was my lesson in the way that Florida roads are marked. Just because it looks like a road does not mean it is meant for anything other than an TV.

With that in mind, I turned off of 44 W and headed north on a road marked NW 38th street. Now nothing can be wrong with a street, right? Well, soon the pavement gave way to hard-packed dirt. Then the dirt gave way to smoothed dirt. Next thing I know I am making a right turn onto sand.

I thought my car was 4WD but boy was a I wrong. Long story short, about a half a mile later I am spinning wheels. The map looks like it shows a better road ahead so I inch forward. When I get there it is more of the same but worse. Soon I have spun myself into a sand trap.

Not too worry, I have AAA. I give them a call and sit back to wait. I call a few friends to pass the time who mention how cam and patient I sound. I am telling you that when it comes right down to it, I actually am the pure definition of patience. Next thing I know my phone rings and it is the AAA guy asking for directions. I am not too happy about that but I relay them. Too much time for comfort passes and finally I see not one but two trucks on the horizon. Neither looks like a tow truck.

“What in the hell are you doing here?” says the guy in the first pick-up truck. Thank god I was in a good mood or this would have been bad.
“I got stuck.”

“I see that. What in the hell are you doing here?” He emphasizes. When I blankly look at him wondering why the AA guy is so nosy he adds: “This is private property. My private property.”

Well, sh*t, I think.

I explain the situation to him and tell him I never meant to invade his property but only was hoping to find a fun new road to run on. Now a gentleman gets out of the other truck and tells me he is the AA guy. He says his truck cannot get in here to tow me out. It is not 4WD. Am I the only one who thinks it is odd that AA doesn’t have a 4WD truck? Aren’t they supposed to help get you out of stuff you can’t get out of on your own?

After trying to figure out what we can do and speaking to the owner of the AAA affiliate who tells me to get all my stuff, leave the vehicle and tell Hertz where it is (are you effin kidding me?!) the owner of the private property says he will be glad to tow me out but the rental company has to send him a liability waiver. I speak to Hertz and even though he cannot be liable for the car says I have the insurance and anything that happens to the car falls on me, they will not fax him a copy of this for his own peace of mind.

And then the Fish and Game Commission police officer guy shows up. He tells me that right now I am on the hook for both trespassing and damaging private property and all that needs to be done for me to be taken away is for the owner of the land to say so. Now, during my time stuck here I have been unfailingly polite. One, I knew I was in deep crap. Two, I was 100% honest in my accidental error. I mean, how does someone own a street called W 38th Street!? I show my software to the police officer and he says: “I can see why you would have made that mistake”. The owner then says: “But didn’t you think something was up when you went through a gate?”

Here I look at him and say “I never saw a gate!” I can tell he in no way believes me. At this point another truck pulls up. There are now three trucks, the Fish and Game Commission truck, and my crappy SUV out in some sand underneath some massive Power line towers in the middle of the blazing sun. I am about 75 % sure I am going to die here this morning. The owner looks at this fella and ask him: “ Did you come in through the [something or other] gate?” This fella says “Nope. It was open.” Oh, thank god.

The owner then says: “Well, I am happy to let him off with a warning. But he is still stuck here and I am not pulling him out without a waiver.” The other guy mentions how my SUV is about 6 feet away from a barbed wire fence, which is connected to a grassy field. He mentions that the owner might allow us to cross this field and then I can be on my way. One phone call later and a few minutes after that, ANOTHER truck pulls up. The owner of the grassy field quickly unhooks some of the barbed wire fence, the police officer hooks a wench up to my SUV, and we back that sucker out.

I thank every person profusely, follow the grassy field owner out to the main road and make a mental note to never stray form the main roads of central Florida again. All I wanted to do was go for a run!

Lest you think I may have over exaggerated my stuckness, please peek below.