First Marathon: Pain is just weakness leaving the body

At the end of May, after completing the Bay to Breakers, I realized I only had two months left to train for my first marathon; San Francisco Marathon, on July 29th, 2007. I don't really race Bay to Breakers because of that initial push of humanity for the first few miles, and with a distance of 12k, it's not really an exercise in endurance. I had been running with coworkers leading up to it, training mostly around the 6 mile mark, and needed to push that up to 26.2.

So June became my biggest race month so far, as a way to intensify training. I started with Lake Chabot Trail Challenge, a half marathon on June 3. With each trail run, I learn humility, and to respect hills. I subsequently used that park to train > half marathon distances, with my Toy Australian Shepherd named Cub, who is the better athlete. We started at 3 mile runs, and quickly worked up to 22 miles together. At the park, I can let him off-leash in areas, and he goes sprinting ahead until he's almost out of sight, where he stops to wait for me to catch up under the shade of a tree. He's a small dog, with big spirit.

My second June race came the day after an 18 mile run. I ran 5k at the Pleasanton Spirit Run on June 17th, and set, by definition (since it's my first), my PR for 5k (22:01). It was a pretty decent showing for not "racing" the run, and I got close to the goal of placing in the top three of my age group, by placing 5th in men 30-39.

Later that week, on Wednesday in the evening, I ran a 5 mile race called the Full Moon Madness 5 mile run. It was a wacky race and thoroughly enjoyable.

June 30th, ran 30k on Pacific Trail Runs Pacifica course. I felt so humbled by the course, and the other runners. The initial 1800 foot climb or so, left me light headed, and I already had thoughts of cutting it short 3 miles in! The downhill refereshed me enough to press onwards, only to be slowed down by wicked stomach craps, cramping thighs and calves, and knee pain. Machismo prevented me from wisely cutting the course short, and I finished the whole 30k to ask the race director to please tell me what I did was harder than running a road marathon. He refused to comply. It was my hardest run yet, and took every ounce of will not to end early (you basically have that option every 10k), and that's the one thing you got to learn if you want to endure. One foot in front of the other until you finish.

July 8th I ran a local 10k, Race to the Lake here in Castro Valley. My knee was still hurting from Pacifica, but I remained strong throughout, and finished at 46:25. Not my best 10k, but the best in 10 years, it was my first time to the "podium"! That's right, I placed second in men 35-39, and got a shiny silver coloured medal. It was a proud moment, even if the men 35-39 was a slow group that day.

My last long run was 22 miles from home into work. I started at 5:55am, and got to work before 10, running 3:30 hours. Boy, what a great run that was. It felt good to run as a means of transportation, and it actually felt good to start the day so early, and watch the neighbourhoods wake up.

The last two weeks before the marathon, my knee continued to degrade, even staying off of it the last week. My muscles were tired, and I wasn't feeling energized. To be honest, I was feeling scared.

I didn't know what pace to run for this race. There is some evidence (the 4 second rule) that I should be capable of a 3:40 finish. I was targeting 4:00 hours, but headed out fast, thinking about 3:40. The first 6 miles were run at around an 8:15 pace, when the outer thigh muscles started hurting. My knee cap started trembling in the first mile, and it wasn't a good sign, but I kept reminding myself that a dull pain is nothing serious. At the Expo, I took the opportunity to meet Dean Karnazes, perhaps the greatest endurance athlete we've seen so far, and bought his book. I read about a third of it that day, and one line from it that was passed to him became my mantra. "Pain is just weakness leaving the body." I decided to press on hard, despite the pain. My half-marathon time was around 1:56:56. I had run the first half the previous two years, my first being 1:51, and last year being my half-marathon PR of 1:48. But at least this morning I still had legs to keep going. Right around 13 miles, that dodgey knee started cramping. I rewrapped it, but it wasn't feeling better. My pace slowed to 9:30, threatening that 4 hour finish. "Pain is just weakness leaving the body...pain is just weakness leaving the body..." That was fine and dandy, but at around 16 miles, my muscles started to cramp. I HAD to slow down or risk tearing something.

The last push was incredibly hard. At 19 miles, a sub-four still seemed possible, but required 9:30 minute miles. I couldn't do it. I was reduced to walking for stints to battle the cramping. At 21 miles, I'd need to step up to 9 min miles to finish sub 4. I had to let it go, and just finish.

There was a lot of walking, and with three miles to go, just wanted it to end. I was so looking forward to end, it almost brought tears to my eyes. I wanted to see my wife and daughter at the finish line. And even then, I couldn't run the final three.

At 4:20:12, I finally crossed the finish line, pretty much smack dab in the middle of the marathon pack. Humbled again, I was trying to figure out how to master this distance. I know I went out too strong today, and had I started with a 9min pace, probably would have had the legs for the final half. I know I was undertrained, and hurting before even starting. And I know that in humility, is where we find our wisdom.

Still, I'm disappointed for not meeting my goal, but glad to finally become a marathoner. Right now I'm going to focus on recovery since I got two half-marathons in September/Oct, and I'm thinking about another full in Nov. And I'm going to shave off oh, about 21 minutes for that one.

Sometimes I wish I could be content with just finishing.

Anyways, gotta run... to bed.